Longevity: Coke isn't just for rum...

[Capn Jimbo]

Sometimes it's what is and sometimes - what isn't...


Bear with me. Again.

This post is really about corporate responsibility - an oxymoron if there ever was one. First, the backstory. I recently noted a really, really big controversy over rum's favorite friend, Coca Cola. Coke, in their never ending quest to become more popular than water, has been promoting their "Vitaminwater" brand. It's really like Zacapa "23"...

A teaspoon of 23 year old rum, or a squirt of vitamins in a barrel of, uh, rum and/or water.

Coke is promoting "Vitaminwater" like the second coming of the creator - and of course lieing about, er promoting, it's amazing health and nutritional benefits. Fortunately this bullshit didn't last long. A class action lawsuit was recently filed based on what the class plaintiff called “deceptive and unsubstantiated claims”, namely that Coke was claiming that this wonder drink was "nutritious" and contained"nutritionally meaningful quantities" of several nutrients including vitamin C and four B vitamins.

Monkeyshit. Coke's attempt to have the case thrown out was denied. Oh, oh!

At the same time the FTC is challenging such products as "Activia" yoghurt and DanActive "health" drinks for their nonsubstantiated claims. The company settled and changed their ad copy. And now UK has taken note and has undertaken examination a whole range of products for similar ridiculous claims.

Coke's companion - product "rum" - has exactly the opposite problem.

In the world of rogue rum it's what many distillers don't claim that is the problem. Most of us fellow idiots foolishly believe that products labeled "rum" are just that - rum. And many of us are really bothered to learn that the exquisite sweetness, vanilla and exotic spiced aromas and wonderful aged falvors aren't those of the rum at all, but are taste engineered additives and artificial flavorings tossed into a vat of thin, cheap rum.

A con job.


Bottom line:

The times they are - at last - changin'!

Before the Obama administration, the Bushite regulators were known for turning the other cheek and pretty much allowing companies to get away with murder. No more.

The FTC is much more active and intent upon actually enforcing the regulations. The UK - where things are even looser - is following suit. And the public-at-large, and the rum drinking sector-in-particular is getting sick and tired of abuse by the ever larger, uncaring, profit grubbing cheatocracy.

My opinion: I think we're seeing the beginning of the end of such dishonesty. The large companies are now concerned that their deceptions will now affect sales, and in a big way. Either product marketing will change, or the purchasing habits of rum drinker will - to more honest, pure and higher quality brands. It's about time.

Let's drink to that!