Tommy Bahama: Terry of Key West named Rumologist

[Capn Jimbo]

Of course he's from Key West...


So who's Jack Terry, what is a "rumologist" and what does any of that have to do with Tommy Bahama?

Let's start here: most of you know - or should - that "Tommy Bahama" doesn't exist, except mostly in the eyes and wallets of the 1%. Bahama is a made up, very successful "lifestyle brand". Having and flaunting your incredibly overpriced Tommy Bahama polo shirt, or TB toilet paper shows that (a) you have lots of disposable income and (b) you don't mind spending lots of it on anything that just happens to carry the TB logo.

And so it was with the "Tommy Bahama" rums - actually a pretty ordinary gold rum - but that came (almost literally) in an expensive Tommy Bahama bottle and opened at close to $50 for what was only a decent mixing rum. Oh, and made by Richard Seale. But despite my great admiration for Richard - and mind you, this was a very good mixing rum - but worth $50.

Never.

Especially because I know that great, even world class sipping rums can be had for far less than that. Consider Seales own 10 Year at $24, or his Doorly's XO for - seriously - $14 recently. Amazing prices for truly great, must have rums. But Tommy Bahama at $50?! No way.

So it wasn't long before TB found itself being closed out for under $20 in many of the stores we frequent. TB = too bad, Tommy. A bad marketing proposition. Apparently the Tommy Bahama lifestyle doesn't extend to the world of rogue rum.


Enter the Tommy Bahama Rumologist.

Most distillers call their shameless PR people "rum ambassadors", a title which is reluctantly accepted. Personally I think a more honest title might be "Rum Butt Lickers" - honest and to the point. I'm a butt man, myself. But nooooooo, the exspurts at TB decided they'd call their butt licker a "rumologist", an obvious spin off of "mixologist", and even invented a dandy, publicity-creating method to choose their new "rumologist".

Simply, they'd solicit You-Tube style videos of the entrants, who'd then be gradually narrowed down in "So you think you can dance?" fashion, until we get the last man - or woman - standing. The winner would get $50,000 (actually pretty cheesy for a "lifestyle brand", don't you think?), and would then travel around shilling for Tommy all around the country.

Either you'd have to have an understanding employer, or more likely quit your job. Hmmm. There were two big, big surprise entries.

The Rum Dood and even more surprising - Luis Ayala! Holy shit! I asked the Dood what he'd do if he won: how would it affect his semi-commercial website, and would he keep his job as bartender? No answer. And Ayala? Now there was a real surprise. Ayala is a very well known author and rum consultant, a man who really, really knows his rums and was the true Minister of Rum, more knowledgable, more honest and publishing his views well before the Preacher.

Now that was surprising.

But no matter. The winner: Jack Terry of where else? Our own Key West, the Conch Republic and southernmost center of our amazing south Florida rum paradise. Let's face it, south Florida and the Keys are the international home of rum. Let's hear it from TB and Jack...

TB and Jack: Now that Jack Terry has become the Tommy Bahama Rumologist, he will begin to experience the unique lifestyle and adventure that can only come from the company with the motto: Make Life One Long Weekend. "We plan on having our Rumologist share his love, passion and knowledge about rum with not only our team, but the public at large," adds Goldberg. "We will get to work immediately creating new rum-inspired cocktails, culinary pairings and hosting events at our locations across the country with Jack as the host."

"Tommy Bahama says that life is one long weekend and that's how I live my life," says Jack Terry, the new Tommy Bahama Rumologist. "This is something I've been training for my entire life. Now I can create a whole new generation of rum drinkers. It's amazing to think I can influence others as the new Tommy Bahama Rumologist."

Jack was the bartender at Bagatelle (though to be honest, we were more likely to be found at the Rum Bar in Key West). We'll be stopping by to congratulate and interview him. Stay tuned.

[Capn Jimbo]

Jack's story...


Credit to "KeysNet.com", of the Florida Keys Keynoter newspaper...

Jack Terry, 39, works at Bagatelle on Duval Street, itself a sort of drinking Mecca. He found out about the contest in July and put together a one-minute video introducing himself and his signature cocktail, the Captain Courageous.

Named after the 1937 Errol Flynn movie, the Captain Courageous mixes Captain Morgan rum, Aperol bitters, mango and sugar water; the cocktail somewhat embodies Key West in that it's vividly colored, tropically refreshing and chock full of booze.

Terry formulated the concoction about a year ago following a conversation with an indecisive customer who threw down a challenge.

"You can't make a martini using Captain Morgan," Terry recalled her saying. "I said, 'watch me.' It was my first try and now it's my signature cocktail."

Wanta see Jack's submission? Click here. Jack played the TB lifestyle card(s) in a series of Key West based videos, promoting the Key West cigar smoking, rum drinking, clothes shedding lifestyle. To be fair, I'm not at all sure that the Bahamanistas know what they're getting into.

After all Key West is about Key West, not at all about I've-got-mine snobbery. It's about long haired ex-hippies riding down the street on a rusty, fat-tired beach bike, with a mini-dog in full drag sitting in the front basket, and a long-tailed squawking African parrot sitting on his shoulder.

Is this really the Tommy Bahama image? We'll see.